True ProLife Definition

Tru fax.

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Will birth be life-threatening to you, the mother?
Oh, well. Have it anyway.

The fetus has a life-threatening birth defect?
Oh, well. Have it anyway.

Rape?
Oh, well. Have it anyway. Besides, pregnancy from "legitimate rape" is rare because the female body can "shut down" the "whole thing" so that fertilization won't occur.

Too young / Unable to care for properly?
Oh, well. Have it anyway and give it up for adoption, even though the orphanages are overflowing and I'm to busy attending this protest to adopt those unwanted kids.

Don't believe your parasitic fetus / human tissue is a gift from god that should be automatically sacred?
Tough shit, you fucking heathen. America is a theocracy, remember. It's murder even though it's not legally defined as such. I'd rather see the Middle East leveled than have one aborted fetus (only for the pro-life warmonger that's common in the US).

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Also, believe it or not, I'm not a baby-hater. I even plan to pop a few out of my cooch one day.